Loving Your Spouse in Light of 1 Corinthians 13 {Part 2}

By Rachel O’Neill, Contributing Writer

Photo by NatShots Photography

Yesterday I shared the first few parts of 1 Corinthians 13. Have you intentionally read 1 Corinthians 13 with the mindset of how it can help your marriage? In Part 1 we covered Love is Patient, Love is Kind, Love Does Not Envy, Love Does Not Boast, and Love is Not Arrogant. Now we will continue with the rest and see what God’s word has to teach us!

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-6, ESV


Learning Lessons from 1 Corinthians 13 {Part 2}

Love is not rude. Our daughter has just reached the age at which she is learning to say “please” and “thank you.” In training her to be polite, my husband and I are seeing how we often neglect to show each other the same simple, common courtesies.

Are you polite to your spouse? Do you speak to them in courteous tones? Or do you find yourself being snarky with them one minute, only to answer the phone with cheerful politeness for a total stranger the next? It is very easy to be polite and kind to others, while treating your spouse like an extra appendage. It should be the other way around- while we should never treat anybody poorly, we should treat our spouses with greater respect and honor than anyone else in our lives!

Love does not insist on its own way. Oftentimes Niall will suggest that we watch a movie… and because we have such different tastes, oftentimes I’d rather not watch what he’s suggested. Instead of insisting on my own way, in love I want to cheerfully agree. It may not be my favorite, but just going with what he suggests and enjoying time spent together will be much more pleasant than complaining and taking a year to decide on a movie we’d both like {anyone else done that?}!

Love is not irritable.  One word for you ladies: hormones. Oh, how I struggle with them! When I am irritable towards my husband, it can be so easy to blame it on that time of the month, or pregnancy. “Some things just go with the territory!” We erroneously think. The truth is, no matter what hormones I may be facing, or what feelings may be brewing in my heart on any given day, love is not irritable.

Love is not resentful. “Resentful” is a strong word, and as much as I’d like to believe that I am never resentful of my husband, it wouldn’t be true. Once again I remember that I am a sinner! Sometimes I resent my spouse not accomplishing my “honey do” list, not prioritizing the things that I think he should, and not doing things my way.  Ouch! Boiled down, this list is pure selfishness on my part, me at my worst.

When my husband sleeps in on a Saturday, but I have to get up bright and early {as usual} with the baby, I struggle with resentment. Love rejoices that the beloved can get extra rest. Love remembers that early mornings are just for a season. In love I can kindly ask my husband to watch the baby while I sleep in or take a nap occasionally. Love is not resentful.

Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. Niall and I have established certain guidelines in our home to help us stay on track in our pursuit of God, family, and other important goals. One of them is that we are finished with the internet from the time he gets home from work each week night.

I have a huge problem- I love to stretch this rule. Feeding the baby a bottle? Perfect time to check Facebook on my phone! When I see Niall taking out his laptop on a week night, I use it as an excuse to waste time and completely abandon our guideline. For me to really love Niall, I need to strive to honor the guidelines he’s set in our home, and encourage him by diligently sticking to it!

The applications of 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 are truly endless. Rather then being overwhelmed by my long list of areas to improve in, I am going to pick one to focus on, attempting to keep the others in mind as they apply.

What is one area of loving your spouse that you feel the Spirit leading you to develop? Share and encourage one another in the comments!

Loving your spouse in light of 1 Corinthians 13 ~ A Biblical Marriage