How we make date nights possible & why it’s important!

By Michael & Marlene Griffith, Contributing Writers

We still remember vividly how much we enjoyed our date nights before getting married. Date nights always meant that we would talk for hours, get to know one another more, tell each other about our hopes and dreams, and look forward to hearing what the other had to say too.

Image courtesy of [Ambro] /

Image courtesy of [Ambro] /

After marriage and kids, we kind of lost that. And we both missed it so much! Being married with kids meant that date nights were few and far between.

The bible teaches us that we should encourage each other and hold our marriage in high esteem, and what an amazing opportunity there is in these special nights together – to be intentional with these things.

Hebrews 10:24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.


Hebrews 10:25 Let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the day approaching


1 Thessalonians 5:11 Encourage one another and build each other up


Hebrews 13:4 Let marriage be held in honor among all


Date nights, special moments that make you feel close to each other ARE encouraging and these moments not only bring you two closer as a married couple, but also and most importantly – closer to God.

So over the years we have tried to be intentional about creating those opportunities, even if we don’t have a sitter (which is 99% of the time). Because of this, our date nights or special moments together were usually at home, in our living room or on our balcony.

We’ll get to what our date nights look like, but first we wanted to share two things we do to make those moments possible, to have our little date nights and special moments that draw us closer.

Making Date Nights Possible

1) We send the kids to their room early

We have an online video streaming. We line up a few movies for the kids to watch in their room, so that we can have a night uninterrupted. Sometimes we will even order them some pizza. Before sending them to their rooms we make sure they are bathed, and ready for bed. They can camp out on the floor (as most kids LOVE!), play board games, build things with their blocks and Lego sets – all while watching a fun move on their computer.

2) We plan ahead

Regardless of how our day or week goes, if we set a date night we keep it. It’s during those rougher times that we need those special moments together. It reenergizes us. Brings us closer. Encourages us.

Here are a few date night ideas

We love each of these, and they are always so refreshing!

1) Sometimes we stay up late

We do this a few times a month. There is something so sweet about snuggling up on the couch with your honey, and talking all night long. Sometimes we’ll talk about a sermon one of us recently heard or about a book one of us is reading.

2) Dinner and a movie

We bring the restaurant food in. Many dates out of the house tend to start with a meal at a restaurant, followed by a movie. With kids and no sitters, that’s really hard for us. So, we order the food to go, and eat it at home. We love ordering from Olive Garden! Sometimes it’s nice having a meal from your favorite date night restaurant, at home.

3) Make a fancy dinner, or your favorite meal together

There is something just so romantic about cooking together. We talk, giggle, and flirt with each other.

Song of Solomon 6:3 I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine


These are our most common date night ideas. We have them at least once a month, and are working on making that at least twice a month – with the goal of having these date nights once a week.

What are some of your favorite date night ideas? Or your favorite way to share a special moment with your beloved?

This post is part of our Date Your Spouse series! The contributors here at A Biblical Marriage have teamed together to bring you 30 days of intentionally dating your spouse! To read more in this series visit the series home page.

Date your spouse!


  1. Sue Peppers says:

    Love DATE NIGHTS! We have been married 38+ years. I agree, when children came along, date nights were sharing late night TV while nursing, tending to sick kids, or soothing the baby with the mixed up inner clock. Getting back to our time alone together had to become a priority. But then we found ourselves pretty much broke…so what to do? Here were some of our cheap dates, with rich returns:
    1. hikes
    2. a walk at the river
    3. tent camping in our own back yard
    4. going to a free community tennis court
    5. taking times reading a book out loud to each other, stopping to discuss (just did this on an 8 hour drive this week)
    6. going through old photo graphs together…to remember our falling in love days, our trips together. This re-ignites the desire to do it again!
    7. taking a walk by the river
    8. taking a bike ride
    9. get in the car and drive without a map…explore, discover together
    10. and most importantly, put DATE NIGHT/DAY/WEEKEND on your calendar and do not move it! Take turns coming up with new ideas within the budget. AND…put the word out to friends and family that if there is a Christmas or birthday or anniversary gift to be given to you…you wish it to be something you do TOGETHER. Getting nails done is fun…but really…if time together builds your marriage up, then do that instead….save the nails till he is away at work. And guys…if you do the guys weekend because you work so hard…be SURE to take 10 more weekends with your wife.
    My thoughts. Dating your spouse will ONLY grow your love and friendship with each other. And THAT is the best gift you can give your children.

  2. Love this!! Thank you for the reminder and encouragement and inspiration. Marriage has felt so different for me, compared to dating, and I have only been married 3 months! (and loving it) We need to be so intentional with our time together, and this is something I know I need to work on in my marriage.
    Thank you!