Compiling Your Own ‘Story of Us’

By Hilary Bernstein, Contributing Writer

Shortly after I got married, I happened to watch the 1999 movie, “The Story of Us.” I can’t vouch that it was a very good – or not very good – movie simply because I can’t remember. One aspect of the movie has stuck with me, though.

The main characters, Ben and Katie, had been married for years. They had a family together, and like every marriage, theirs had plenty of highs and lows. The movie documented these extremes. Once hitting a low point, the couple chose to separate and divorce. Throughout the entire movie I hoped they would reconcile and stay married.

Compiling Your Own Story of Us

Even in their ugliest moments, I found a beauty in the couple’s marriage. They were husband and wife. They were sinful humans – like all of us – but they navigated through life’s messy challenges together. There’s something truly amazing in that.

And that’s the something truly amazing in your marriage and mine. Life is not easy. Everyone goes through fantastic and horrific experiences. That’s life. The chance to experience all of that with another person – your mate – is a gift.

As Genesis 2:24 states,

“A man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (emphasis mine).


As husband and wife, you’re one flesh. Your own “Story of Us” tells all about your journey together. (It’s a lot like the montage of Carl and Ellie at the beginning of the Disney movie, “Up.”)

Celebrating your marriage

As a way to celebrate your own extremes, think of your own “Story of Us.” To help you out, here are some questions:

  • How did you meet? Were you attracted to each other at first, or did it take a while?
  • Think about your first date together. What happened?
  • What were some of your favorite dates together before you got married?
  • How did your spouse win your heart?
  • Recall your engagement proposal.
  • Think about your wedding preparation – what highlights stick out?
  • Try to remember all of the details about your wedding day. Who was in your wedding? Who was at your wedding? Where was your wedding? What was the ceremony like? What about a reception?
  • Recall your wedding night.
  • If you took a honeymoon, where did you go? What did you do?
  • Think about the major events you’ve experienced as husband and wife. What jobs have you held while married? Where have you lived? Think about your housing searches and moving days.
  • If you have children, remember how you discovered you were expecting. What stays in your mind about your pregnancy?
  • What was your unique childbirth story?
  • What health challenges have you endured together?
  • What financial challenges have you worked through?
  • What kind of loss have you experienced together?
  • What middle of the night moments stick out in your mind?
  • How have you grown closer to God together?
  • How have you had fun together?

Have you thought about your story lately?